Thank you. Tomorrow this is going on the printer. Who's the poetry lover now?

Oh what the hell. I also googled "anus pus" and will print the first link that came up.

Aren't they just midget onions?

The other day in the office i went to the printer to get my copy of "Dividend and capital gains taxation", and saw that someone had printed out "The Lady of Shallot" by Alfred Tennyson. It starts

On either side the river lie
Long fields of barley and of rye,
That clothe the world and meet the sky;
And thro' the field the road runs by
To many-tower'd Camelot;
And up and down the people go,
Gazing where the lilies blow
Round an island there below,
The island of Shallot

....and on and on for 5 fucking pages. How much crack did this man smoke? I know that without the shallot we wouldn't have sambal balachan, but this is ridiculous. And I'm a big fan of misusing corporate resources, but at least do it for something good.

So i'm going to do a little extra-curricular printing of my own. Give me some suggestions for random stuff i can print and leave sitting on the printer to see if anyone notices.

Anything other than porn is ok - that goes in my private collection.

Oh Mr Potato, you've done it again.

Caption competition - And the winner is....

By EeeeevilGirlie!!!

As promised, all the kueh u can eat...

Caption competition - A flurry of entries!

From someone mysterious:

"Don't look now but i think that handsome young lady with the beard over there is making a pass at you"

"Would you masticate my porridge for me please? i think i left my gums in the car "

Sorry i cldn't fit them in the bubble

Caption competition - Entry 4

By EeeeevilGirlie

Yeh me again

Caption Competition - Entry 3

By Puunkroc

Caption competition - Entry 2

By Stoo

V, if u read this - muvm

Ultimate Sacrifice Department

Saw this testimonial in Friendster, from a girl to a guy:

Thx for your testi~ And thx so much for coming to my b-day party last time~
=) Though only met you twice, you are really a nice gentlemen in my
impression.Wish to see you again soon! =P

Dude, good gift for her bday, but I wouldn't be giving those away too freely. You might need em for procreation, if not with her. Maybe next time a nice card will do.

Received an email today:

Dear all,

Please be advised xxx will do a presentation to all next
Monday 9th May at 4.30pm.

Dial in details together with xxx's
presentation will be sent to you next Monday.

Kindly diarise for the
time being.

Diarise. Diarise. I'll diarise you m**f**ker.

Caption competition: Entry 1

By EeeeevilGirlie

Caption competition

Entries to the shoutbox or the comments page... winners get some of that delicious kuey that LHL is eyeing suspiciously

P.S. Happy birthday Anne... i hope u got some ice cream

An existential reply to my cousin

Colonel Nathan Jessep on the Stand

You can't handle the truth! Son, we live in a world that has walls. And those walls have to be guarded by men with guns. Who's gonna do it? You? You, Lt. Weinberg? I have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom. You weep for Santiago and you curse the Marines. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know: that Santiago's death, while tragic, probably saved lives. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves lives...You don't want the truth. Because deep down, in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me on that wall. You need me on that wall.We use words like honor, code, loyalty...we use these words as the backbone to a life spent defending something. You use 'em as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very freedom I provide, then questions the manner in which I provide it! I'd rather you just said thank you and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a weapon and stand a post. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you're entitled to!